Why Cycling is the gayest sport ever.
I had a revelation this morning as I was driving to work. Cycling is going to replace figure skating as the gayest of all sports. Before anyone gets all defensive, I have evidence.
Exhibit A: The outfits. One word on this topic. Spandex. Even worse. Head to toe spandex. I can understand the spandex if you are in the Tour de France but for the average joe it’s overkill. Who are you racing, spandex man? Huh, who? Do you need to shave 2 seconds off of your best time cycling down your street? I mean, honestly. If I had the time, and was willing to stop the car as I zipped pass you, I would totally slap you in the face.
Exhibit B: The fact that groups of “straight” men get together and wear matching outfits to go cycling. Just this morning I was driving to work and saw a group of 8 men wearing matching baby blue spandex outfits. BABY BLUE! No lie. Unless you are on a professional sports team, or are in the Olympics, matching outfits are a bit much. I don’t know any gay guys who would go out and buy matching spandex outfits and go ride bikes in them. In public. Even male figure skaters most likely only wear the outfits they do because they are forced into it by their three hundred pound, knee breaking Russian trainers.
I rest my case.
posted by Chris at 9:41 PM
3 Comments:
You may be onto something here Chris. But for me, at any rate, it's reverse. Straight athletic men in spandex has become my favorite spectator sport.
5:56 PM
I had the unfortunate incident in high school of having my now father-in-law answer the door in bright yellow spandex biking ... outfit (?). No one ever wants to see their future father-in-law like that.
And, as someone whose older sister taped each ice skating event of my childhood and forced me to watch them over and over and over again with her, I must point out that most male figure skaters don't really wear spandex in the same sense that bikers do. True, their outfits are a bit ruffley, but not so much spandex. It's all the divers, and swimmers, and speed skaters, etc.
10:32 AM
Curios indeed doll...you are a wise sage.
9:12 PM
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