Why I Hate TiVO...

Late last night I was scrolling through the T.V. Guide menu on my TiVO (flipping channels is soooo passé!) and I came across a show called Pants Off Dance Off. Being curious I pushed the info button and this is what I read, “Shedding their clothes down to their skivvies while dancing to popular music videos for the chance to win bragging rights and some hard earned cash.”

I thought to myself, “Certainly this can’t be what the show is really about…” The show didn't start for an hour, so of course I recorded it. I am sad to report that the description was 100% accurate. For a chance to win $200 people can dance around to a music video and have the general public vote, American Idol style, and determine who was the best naked dancer.

Naturally, I watched the entire episode and realized that it’s not just attractive young people who are stripping to popular music videos. The have old men, old women, fat men, vagrants, mental patients, and even midgets…I am truly and utterly speechless…

I swear some of these people are homeless and bordering on mentally retarded. One woman, Savannah, was the dancing equivalent to William Hung. She shook her tootie to a random Nine Inch Nails song. Nine Inch Nails? Earth to Savannah! NIN is not dance music! As if her dancing wasn’t humiliating enough, the producers of the show ran the following caption while she was dancing, “Savannah is wearing a sexy purchase from Kmart’s lingerie department.” Insult to injury. Insult. To. Injury.

The most shocking piece of information is yet to come. TiVO categorized this show as News / Business. Again, truly and utterly speechless...

Ps. For those of you who don’t believe me, go to the website and prepare to be amazed. www.fuse.tv/pants. Don’t say I didn’t warn you…